The Case of the Fallen Christmas Tree

My husband, Michael wrote this poem about an incident that happened a few years ago. A little background information for those who don't already know...He is a professional pet groomer by profession...Abby was our sweet Westie dog...and Figgy was our cat. Read to the end. It will surely make you smile.

The Case of the Fallen Christmas Tree

T'was the night before Christmas

From work I did come

I was ready for dinner

And some Christmas fun

The dogs were all groomed

They were clean, they were pretty

Which was good because when they first got there

They all smelled pretty sh...y

The day was done

It was good to be home

Let Christmas begin

I'll wrap Abby's bone

I entered the living room, lively and quick

To plug in the lights for old Saint Nick

When what to my wondering eyes did appear

My Christmas tree had fallen and I lost all my cheer

The tree lay flat on the living room rug

It looked pretty ugly, like a Chinese Pug

The lights were tangled, and they were unplugged

Ornaments were scattered all over the rug

I scratched my head as I surveyed the scene

How could it have fallen, the pretty Christmas tree

Abby stood loyally by Uncle Mike's side

She knew what had happened, but a snitch she could not abide

She would keep this secret and she wouldn't tell

Even if it meant she would burn in ...(the really hot place)

Sandra came home and slowly began

To redecorate the tree like only she can

She re-hung the lights and re-strung the garland

She did a great job. She's such a darlin'.

When picking up ornaments, a bird she did find

A beautiful red bird, it was one of a kind.

But there was something different about this little bird

She handed it to me without saying a word

I looked at it closely, it was no longer smooth

I knew in an instant its head had been chewed

Its' beautiful red feathers had been torn and removed

As if a fat house cat had something to prove

The mystery solved, it all came together

Figgy had done it for love of a feather

She had climbed in the tree, her bird to pursue

A very bad thing for a fat cat to do

The tree had stood strong, of this I am sure

But fat Figgy's weight was too much to endure

So it had fallen, the pretty little tree

Knocking over the Playstation 3

Surrounded by chaos, old Figgy did sit

If they figure I did it, I'll be in deep s..t

So she lay on the couch as if nothing had happened

She just didn't care, she just lay there nappin'

Thus solves the case of the Fallen Down Tree

Have a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year to thee

Michael Falcone   Dec. 2008