Adina the Snarky Fairy and the Curious Box

Arkansas Writer's Conference Honorable Mention    

 

      Adina flitted among the flowers as quickly as her little fairy wings would carry her. Menacing dark clouds rumbled overhead. “I hope I can make it to that cave before the rain starts. I hate getting wet.” She waved her hand to initiate a magical boost to speed her to the sanctuary. The wind picked up and the first fat drops fell just as she reached the opening. Adina snapped her fingers and fairy lights danced around the cave. She backed deeper in to avoid the rain blowing through the entrance.

     “Hello.” A soft voice beckoned.

     Adina snapped around to come face to face with a strange little creature with long ears and twitching whiskers. It was a dirty brown color and moved silently a few steps back. “Are you a dust bunny?” Adina’s eyes widened in recognition of the rare magical creature. “I’ve never met one of your kind before. What are you doing here? How did you even get here?”

     The bunny moved forward again. “Hello. My name is Rupert. And yes, I am a dust bunny. I’m not really sure how I got here. I was taking some sun in the window and it was quite windy. I

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was blown out into the street and then into a basement through a grate. There was a man sitting at a desk…and then I was here.”

     “I’m Adina.” She reached out to touch the creature. “Sorry.” Adina drew her hand back, embarrassed. “It’s just that I’ve heard of dust bunnies, but just in stories.” She brushed her hands together, then wiped them discreetly on her dress. “What are you?”  

     “Well Adina, dust bunnies are magical creatures from the Common World. There was a time when we flourished there. We lived under the beds of humans to keep the monsters away. Our numbers dwindled and we began to disappear when people began cleaning under their beds regularly. That, of course, allowed monsters into their world.”

     “Stupid humans.” The fairy rolled her eyes.

     “I was fortunate that the humans in my house stored things under the bed. I had a safe place behind a box marked ‘craft supplies’ and a box marked ‘fat clothes’. They never vacuumed that far back.”

     A violent crack of lightening followed immediately by a boom of thunder caused them both to jump and move instinctively farther into the cave. Adina noticed a passageway towards the back. “Have you been back there? I wonder how far it goes.”

     “I came from back there but it’s too dark to see anything. I felt my way through the dark until I saw the light from the opening. But I was afraid to go outside. I knew it was going to rain and as you might imagine, water and dust bunnies are not a good combination.”

    

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     Adina flicked a finger and the fairy lights swirled and floated through the passageway, illuminating a path. “I don’t like getting wet either. The storm isn’t letting up any time soon.  Let’s see what’s back here.” Rupert hopped soundlessly by her side. 

     Just a short distance down, the passage opened to another cave. Adina’s lights swirled around the ceiling of the smaller room. In the center sat a strange device, a curious metal box with five toggle switches and a big red button in the center. “Did you see this when you were back here?”

     “As I said, it was completely dark. I can’t make light. I think this is where I was earlier but I don’t recognize that machine.” Rupert sniffed suspiciously at the box.

     Adina flipped a couple of the switches. Nothing happened. “What do you think it does?”

     Rupert eyed her nervously. “I don’t know, but maybe don’t go flipping switches on a machine you know nothing about.”

     “I don’t think it does anything.” Adina flipped another toggle and pushed the red button.

     Suddenly, they were standing behind a snowbank. The air was biting cold. They heard loud pops followed by explosions. Adina blinked at the brightness of the sun gleaming on the snow. She fluttered up to the top of the snowbank to see a mighty battle. There were armored vehicles and huge mechanical beasts lumbering across a frozen plain. Fantastic contraptions flew through the air shooting fire. When one crashed nearby, the impact sent a wave of snow in their direction. Adina dropped behind the snowbank.

     Rupert hopped behind Adina just in time. A splash of wet slushy snow smacked her in the face, running down her front and landing with a sploosh, right on top of her shoes. She turned to

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glare at the mostly dry dust bunny. Rupert took one timid step back to avoid the slush dripping off her pointed nose. Adina pushed her sodden hair behind a pointed ear. “I think we should leave now.” The bunny just blinked. “Push the button again!” She yelled.

     Rupert scurried to the machine, dramatically slamming a paw on the red button. He and Adina both braced in anticipation of returning to the cave. Nothing happened. Rupert’s eyes widened. He pushed again and again to no avail. “Nothing’s happening. And I don’t know if you’ve noticed but the sounds of the battle are getting closer.”

     Adina winced as another explosion shook the ground. “You must not be doing it right.” She fumed. “I’m wet and cold and I want out of here! I hate getting wet!” Adina flipped two of the toggles before trying the red button again.

       A hot dry wind blew sand in her face. Adina squeezed water out of her dress, turning her back to the wind. Looking around she realized that there was nothing but sand in every direction.

     “Help!” Rupert cried out. He gripped the machine as the desert wind threatened to tear him apart or carry him away. “I can’t hold on much longer.”

     “I’m coming.” The wind battered Adina’s wings, rendering them useless. She ran toward the machine.

     Rupert struggled to maintain his hold. The wind buffeted him. His little paws slipped, and scrambling for a grip, he flipped a toggle switch just as the wind snatched him away. Adina missed Rupert’s outstretched paw but hit the red button on the machine.

    

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     Her bottom bounced off the spongy ground. Rupert landed in a poof of dust nearby. Adina looked up to see colorful birds flitting from branch to branch in tall pink trees. “That’s new.” She blinked. “Or maybe I hit my head.”

     “Nope. They’re pink. The grass is pink and the sky is soft orange, like a cantaloupe.” Rupert stood on his hind legs, swiveling his head back and forth. “So many colors!” He hopped excitedly in a circle. “Trees with pink leaves and trees with leaves of aquamarine! Some of the trunks are bright green and some a deep purple. I’ve never imagined flowers with bright blue stems and petals of lavender.” The grubby brown bunny sighed deeply. “I’m a reflection of my environment. I spend most of my time in the dimly lit dinginess under the bed. This must be heaven!” He bounced on his hind legs kicking into the air, landing with a thump. He hopped once and bounded away, scampering around the trees and sniffing the flowers.

     “Crazy rabbit.” Adina scowled. She sat still but the ground moved beneath her. “This place is weird. But you are right. It’s colorful. I know a few fairies who’d love it.” She rocked to and fro with the rolling ground. “It feels like I’m on a boat…made of carpet, with freaky pink grass on it.” Adina scanned the area. “Hey Rupert. Are you listening?”

     The dust bunny popped out of a pink bush with blue and purple flowers. “I heard you. I noticed. The ground is bouncy.” He hopped toward the fairy. “Why are you smiling? You think this place is weird.”

     “It got a little better. I think it’s just weird enough.” Adina’s smile broadened. “Dust bunnies are a reflection of their environment, huh?” She raised her eyebrows at him.

    

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     “Why are you looking at me like that?” Rupert glanced down at his feet. They were pink. He looked over his shoulder and saw bits of color from the flowers he’d run through. His cotton tail was bright blue. Pulling down a long ear he saw smudges of purple and green. He laughed, and laughed, and laughed, rolling in the pink grass. Adina couldn’t help but giggle at the colorful bunny.

     While he frolicked, Adina inspected the machine. “This contraption works a bit like a portal; except we don’t walk through. It sends us instantaneously. It seems that the toggles determine location and as we have experienced, the red button sends us there.”

     She found walking on the spongey landscape difficult and decided to fly as her friend hopped from flower to flower. The panorama below her was a spectacle of color. “You have to see this,” she called to Rupert. Adina fluttered down to her new friend. He appeared to be roughly half her size. “I think I can carry you.” When she took him in her arms she was amazed at how little he weighed. “You’re light as a feather.”

     “Dust bunnies don’t typically weigh much.” Rupert gripped around her neck. She flew high into the trees. “It’s beautiful, Adina. Thank you.”

     Adina smiled. “It is amazing. I would love to see more of this place.”

     “What are those?” Rupert pointed to large bubble-like fruit hanging in some of the trees.

     “You stay here and I’ll see if I can pick one.” Adina deposited him on a high branch. She flitted to the bubble-tree. She reached for one but her wing tip made contact with a large bubble above her. There was a gentle pop and Adina was drenched with water. The volume of fluid

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drove her downward. She twitched water from her wings and caught enough air to flutter drunkenly to the not-so-solid ground. Once again her dress was sodden and her hair soaked. “I’ve seen enough of this place,” Adina declared. “I’m wet! Again! It’s time to go home.”

     “Oh can’t we stay a little longer?” Rupert pleaded, bouncing on a branch high above her. He lost his footing as he hopped along the limb and before Adina could react, came crashing to the ground in a puff of colorful dust.

     Adina fluttered to her flattened friend. “Rupert!”

     “Ouch.” Rupert shook himself back to his regular shape. “I’m okay.”

     “What? That fall should have broken every bone in your body. How are you okay? Adina shook her head.

     Rupert smiled. “Thanks for your concern but dust bunnies don’t have bones. We are held together by magic. I’m literally a ball of magic…and dust and stuff.”

     Adina flipped a toggle on the curious box. Rupert threw up a paw to stop her but she’d already pushed the red button.

     Rupert fell across Adina’s lap. She sat on the green grass in the shade of an oak tree. “This is the common world,” Rupert’s nose twitched. “I guess I’m home.” He sighed. Adina fluttered her wings but he made no effort to move from her lap.

     “What is this place?” She asked, noting the activity in the area.

     “This is a park. Human children come here to play.” Rupert nodded to the rampaging youngsters on the playground. While they watched, a little girl approached.

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     “Mama. Somebody left a fairy doll.” The child squealed. “And the fairy’s got a bunny.” The girl’s keeper waved from a bench nearby. “Your wings are pretty.” She reached for Adina.

     “Thank you, but please keep your hands to yourself.” Adina admonished the child.

     “It talks. It talks.” The girl bellowed. She grabbed the fairy and began squeezing her. “Again, again. Say something else.” She pinched Adina’s foot and poked at her belly.

     “She thinks you’re a toy.” Rupert whispered.

     “Unhand me, brute!” Adina flicked her hand and a few tiny sparks erupted. The surprised child loosened her grip so that Adina could wrench free and flutter up into the safety of the tree. Unfortunately, Rupert remained firmly in her grasp.

     “Mama, mama. She flew up in the tree.” The little girl yelled to the adult.

     “Carol, if you’ve thrown another toy into a tree, I’m not going to the trouble of getting a ladder and fishing it out for you.” The woman yelled back, exasperated.

     “I didn’t. She flew up there herself.” The child dropped Rupert unceremoniously on the grass. She began jumping up and down. “Get it! I want it!”

     The adult human saw that the small one was winding up for a full scale meltdown. “It’s time for us to go.” She began gathering their belongings.

     “I want that doll. She talks.” The tears began, followed by shrieking sobs. “I want it!”

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     While the little angel screamed and pulled her own hair, Adina dropped down to where Rupert lay crumpled on the grass next to the machine. “Now if I put these switches back the way they were the very first time…” She flipped the toggles into place.

     Adina paused. “Rupert, you do want to come with me, right?”

     The bunny brightened. “Oh, yes please!”

     The red faced girl turned just in time to see the fairy stick out her tongue and push the red button.

     Adina gestured in the darkness and fairy lights twinkled above them, illuminating the small cave. Rupert followed her up the path to the opening. Bright sunlight poured through the entrance.   “The storm is over. I can fly you to the village.” Adina and Rupert stepped into the sunlight.

     “I think that apparatus is better left alone.” The fairy raised her hands with a flourish. Rocks above the cave tumbled over the entrance. “That should keep out any prying eyes.” She dusted off her hands. “Have you given any thought to where you’d like to live?” Adina questioned the bunny as they fluttered over the meadow. “If you really want to live under the bed, I know a human and I’m certain he never cleans.”

Ladies Night

2nd Place Winner Arkansas Writer's Conference 2019

     Karen looked over her itinerary while cradling the phone against her ear. “Yes, Blanch. There are five ladies coming this afternoon. They’ll be here any minute. What do you mean you aren’t coming? I’m not a life coach. I’m just a secretary.” Karen pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’ve never taken lead at a team building before. Well, thank you for the vote of confidence but why aren’t you going to be here again? Yes, I have the table all laid out. It looks great. But wait. Are you sure? Okay, but what if...Blanch? Are you there?” She sighed loudly. They aren’t going to like me. They’ll know I’m not really a life coach. They’ll all demand their money back and I’ll get fired! Karen struggled to get her imagination under control. “Deep breath. You can do this Karen,” she whispered to herself.

     She turned toward the door to find an older lady dressed entirely in pink standing just behind her. “Oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t hear the door.” Karen extended her hand.

     “I didn’t use the door.” The woman looked around distastefully, waving off the offered handshake with a pink-gloved hand.

     A little confused, Karen nervously arranged the napkins while the lady in pink positioned herself at the head of the table. Two young women strode through the door. A tall redhead dressed in shades of green with flowers in her hair headed straight to the planter boxes where large ferns spilled out reaching for the sun. The pretty blonde snagged a cookie from the table and hopped up to sit on the window sill. She moved with feline grace in her tight black pants and leather jacket. Karen smiled widely, about to introduce herself when the door slammed against the wall as it was kicked open.

     “Hello, girls.” A petite young woman dressed in brightly colored tights and a very short skirt sauntered in carrying a baseball bat. There were streaks of pink and blue in her platinum hair. 

     “I can take that for you if you’d like.” Karen offered, reaching for the bat. “We didn’t plan for baseball, but there are several great activities this weekend.

     “Okay.” The colorful nymph surrendered the bat, popping her gum in spectacular fashion.

     Karen leaned in closer. “Your mascara is a little smudged.”

     The girl leaned in closer still. “I like it that way,” she whispered.

     Karen plastered on her best smile. “Oh of course. We are all about choices here. Everyone should have their own personal style.” She glanced at her itinerary again. “We have just one more …” She trailed off as she noticed the elegant Asian woman, dressed all in gray, leaning in the corner. “Oh. Didn’t see you there.”

     “I’m glad everyone made it here. Welcome to Garden Lodge. My name is Karen and I’ll be your guide on this fun and hopefully transformative weekend. We have some wonderful activities planned. You are just going to love it. Now we can begin with introductions. Just tell your name, a little about yourself and what you hope to get out of this retreat.” After a long awkward silence, Karen continued. “I’ll start us off. My name is Karen P., and believe it or not this is my first time to lead a team building retreat. I enjoy cooking and scrapbooking. This weekend I hope to make some lasting friendships. Now, who’s next?”

     “I’ll go.” The colorful nymph spoke up. “My name is Harley Q. I like long walks on the beach and creating mayhem with my Pooky. He’s quite the joker. I wanted to get out of this retreat all together but it is court appointed so, here I am.”

     “And what would you like to accomplish this weekend?” Karen chimed.

     “My shrink thinks I need to learn to bond with other women. I just want to get through this thing without killing anyone. The Doc was really adamant about that. You know, the not killing part.” She blew a big purple bubble and popped her gum loudly.

     Karen swallowed hard. “Ooookay, who’s next?” Her gaze landed on the older lady in pink.

     “I am Dolores U., formerly headmistress at Hogwarts School.” She spoke with a squeaky British accent. “I am an educator and strict disciplinarian. For instance, that gum smacking would not be tolerated if I were in charge.”

     “Good thing you ain’t in charge then.” The cute blonde sitting in the window sill spoke up. Harley laughed, popping her gum in a machine gun fashion.

     Dolores cleared her throat and continued. “I like a good strong spot of tea, all shades of pink, and kittens. I don’t care for cats but I do adore the little ones.”

     The redhead in the back of the room sniggered. “If she likes kittens, what does she do with them when they grow up?”

     The blonde perched in the window bounded soundlessly to the floor. “What’s wrong with cats? I like cats, little and big ones.” Dolores shot her a nasty look.

     Karen stepped up to diffuse the situation.  She turned to the blonde. “What can you tell us about yourself?”

     The blonde turned dismissively from the older woman. “My name is Selina K. I’m here because Ivy thought it would be fun. I like fun.” She raised an eyebrow at her friend. “Better be fun.”

     “And what do you do?” Karen tried to keep the conversation going.

     Selina chuckled. “I’m in acquisitions. I like to acquire pretty things.”

     “And you?” Karen addressed the redhead.

     “My name is Ivy,” she stated dreamily. “I like plants.” She turned from the group to gently stroke the fronds of the fern.

 

     “So we have Harley, Dolores, Selina, and Ivy.” Karen gripped the back of a chair so the ladies would not see her nervousness. She looked to the silent woman in the corner. “Would you like to introduce yourself?” 

     “I am Talia A., daughter of the Demon Head and leader of the League of Assassins. I am here to hone my social skills.”

     “That’s just wonderful.” Karen gushed. “Now you ladies get acquainted. Help yourself to the buffet. There are mimosas! I’m just going to pop back to the kitchen and make sure everything is ship shape.” Karen pushed through the swinging doors, stumbled past the kitchen staff, and scurried to the storage closet. She fumbled with her phone. “Blanch!” She whispered vehemently. “Voicemail? Pick up, Blanch. I don’t think arts and crafts are going to cut it with these ladies. Call me back!” Karen hissed.

     After their meal Karen showed the ladies around the lodge. “This is where we’ll be sleeping.” She opened the door to a large bedroom with six twin beds. It was nicely appointed with dressers and comfy chairs. The potted plants around the room made it homey and elegant.

     “You expect us to all sleep in the same room?” Dolores’ tone was caustic.

     “Aww, come on Pinky D.” Harley performed a perfect handstand. “It’ll be just like summer camp.” She somersaulted across the room landing with a thump. Ivy applauded. Harley took a bow.

     “Now Dolores,” Karen interjected. “This event is about team building and making connections. That’s why we all stay together. We’ll do everything as a team. Earlier I don’t believe you had a chance to tell us what you hope to get from this weekend. Why did you choose this retreat?”

     Dolores looked embarrassed. All eyes turned to her. Her face glowed the same color as her bright pink jacket. “I had a Groupon.” There was a moment of silence before the chuckling started. Selina laughed out loud. Even the stoic Talia cracked a smile. Dolores was unapologetic. “I like Groupon.”

     After the ensuing laughter subsided Karen remarked. “I love Groupon. And I’m so happy to know that our promotion paid off.”  She continued with the tour. “The dining room is where we’ll have our meetings. There’s a solarium. I just call it a screened porch.” She laughed nervously. “There’s also a hiking trail on the property. It goes through the trees back to an abandoned quarry. That’s a nice place to walk but I don’t recommend swimming there. It’s quite deep and I believe unsafe.”

     “I knew this area looked familiar. I’ve been to that quarry with Pooky. It’s a good place to dump a bod…” Harley hesitated. “There may be stuff in the water. Well, there’s definitely stuff in the water,” she cackled.

     Karen cleared her throat. “After we get our things squared away, I have a surprise for you.” Half an hour later, Karen had the ladies loaded into a van. The driver delivered them to their destination.

     As they exited the van Talia remarked. “This is your surprise? An escape room? You honestly don’t have any idea who we are.” She shook her head at Karen.

     They were escorted into a large room with gothic furniture and floor to ceiling bookshelves. Karen rubbed her hands together. “This is going to be so much fun! Once they lock the door, we have just ninety minutes to find the clues to our escape. We must work as a team to accomplish our goal. There are clues throughout the room. We can start by looking through all the books for clues.”

     Harley opened her sequined purse. “I have a little Semtex right here. I can blow that door with no problem.”

     “I don’t like being locked up.” Selina pulled a bobby pin from her hair. “I’ll pick that lock easily.”

     “For heaven’s sake!” Dolores exclaimed. “This is a ridiculous task.” She pulled a slender stick from her sleeve and waved it at the door. “Alohamorah.” The door swung open.

     The attendant, a pimply faced teen, stood awestruck with a bag of Cheetos in one hand and a Mountain Dew in the other. “Three minutes! That’s gotta be a record.” He peered into the room as the ladies filed out. “It usually takes at least twenty minutes to find the porcelain cat with the key inside.” Ivy ran her long fingers along his collar giving him a gentle shove into the room.

     Selina nudged the door closed. “I wonder if he means this porcelain cat.” She held a blue and white statue up to the light. She gave the feline figurine a gentle shake. Something rattled inside. “Guess so.”

     “Hello? It locks from that side,” the attendant called out.

     “Should we…” Karen took a step toward the door.

     “He’ll be fine.” Talia took her by the elbow and guided her to the van. 

     Harley skipped past the van and ran into the darkness. “See ya later bitches!” she called over her shoulder.

     “Wait!” Karen called out. “We should really stay together.” There was no reply from the darkness. She shrugged and climbed into the van with the rest of her charges. Now I’ve lost a participant. I am so fired. Karen sighed loudly and slumped in her seat. “I haven’t been totally honest with you ladies,” she confessed. “I am not a life coach. I’m only a secretary. The escape room was supposed to take much longer and I’m pretty sure this group is not interested in macramé.” Her words tumbled out.

     The usually silent Talia spoke up. “You aren’t equipped to handle this group.”

     “I know. I know.” Karen moaned.

     Ivy giggled. “No one is.”

     Talia continued. “Look Karen. I really am the leader of the League of Assassins. Dolores is a wand-waving witch. Selina is a world class cat-burglar, and I say that with admiration; and Harley is certified crazy.”

     “Her boyfriend is homicidal psycho, the Joker.” Selina interjected. 

     Karen raised her head and glanced around at the women. “And Ivy?”

     “They call me Poison Ivy. I like plants.” Ivy smiled, looking out the window.

     “Ivy is something else altogether.” Selina stretched in her seat.

     Karen took a deep breath. “There’s an actual League of Assassins?” She looked from Talia to Selina. “Acquisitions. Funny, you know since you … but world class is, well,” she trailed off in a daze. After a moment Karen leaned over the seat to say a few words to the driver before turning back to her group. “Liquor store?”

     Harley parked the stolen motorcycle in front of the lodge. She could hear raucous laughter coming from the dining room. Upon entering, she saw Karen sitting on a table as Ivy wove flowers into her hair. She watched Karen take a long drink from a bottle of bourbon, then hand it to Talia. Harley shouted, “Dang girls! What did I miss?”

     Karen waved. “Harley, you’re back. Look what Ivy did.” She pointed to the back of the room filled with flowers. “I didn’t even know those ferns bloomed.” Then she noted in horror the red stains on Harley’s white t-shirt. “You promised you weren’t going to kill anyone.” Her speech slurred. “Harrely, you didn’t. Did you?”

     Harley glanced at her shirt. “Oh no, no, no. I didn’t. Promised the Doc, you know. Don’t look at me like that,” she giggled. “I had a jelly doughnut. A girl needs a snack, ya know.”

     “And did you bring enough for everyone?” Dolores chirped, daintily sipping gin from a teacup.

     Harley rolled her eyes. “No!”

     The collected ladies glared at her. Selina reached for the dagger in her boot. Talia’s hand went to the sword concealed in her long gray sweater. Harley threw up her hands. “Well, I don’t know who’s doing carbs.”

     “Ooooh.” The ladies nodded in unison.

     “Yep. Makes sense.” Karen agreed. She breathed a sigh of relief.

     “Today is not a cheat day.” Selina purred.

     Talia shrugged. “I’m doing keto anyway.”

     Karen laid her head on the table, giggling. “I like doughnuts.”

     Sunlight filtered through the wall of foliage creeping over the windows. Karen awoke with a start. “Ow.” She moaned softly, cradling her head in her hands. “Never drink again.” As her feet hit the floor she noted the unsettling silence. She blinked to focus. The pounding in her skull made it difficult. On the bedside table was a bottle of water and a stack of papers. After downing half the bottle, she read the note on top.

Dear Karen,

We all agreed that one day was all the team building we needed. (As evidence, we all agreed.) You showed us a good time and we got through the night without any bloodshed. Here are the evaluations for the event. We each gave you a great review.

With fondness,

Dolores Umbridge

Talia Al Ghul

Harley Quinn

Selina Kyle

Ivy

P.S. Ivy says the “botanicals” she put in your water will help with the hangover and should kick in quickly.

     Karen grinned as her head swam and knees buckled. I gotta find a new job.